Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Two Women's Thoughts

Pat McCallum:

I love dancing "from the inside out"....and I love dancing with men who do that--who seem to be leading from deep inside themselves...which seems to make it easier for me to follow them [than if they are only "thinking" about what to do next].

Although I don't know the explanation for the difference, my guess is that the ones I find it easier to follow--and who I enjoy following the most--are those who are leading from their Whole body, rather than mainly from their heads.

Yes, I know that there may be technically perfect leaders--and followers--who may not value or grok this..... AND it is delicious to me!

In fact, I can be buoyed for a week or so by the memory of even one or two such dances. This type of communion is exquisite--and the reason I keep coming back to tango.

On the other hand, I also enjoy dancing with men who are always experimenting, and leading me in new ways and I need to stay very tuned to my insides, and therefore be more available to picking up, sensing, where they are, and what they are wanting of me, in each poignant moment. In those dances, it is thrilling in another way...sort of a dance of discovery. [In a funny way, I feel as if I'm being deftly led westward, across the plains, in the arms of a modern-day Lewis or Clark. Always venturing where we've never gone before...]

Recently, in a very crowded practicum at the home of one of my teachers, it was literally a mob scene, of mainly beginner dancers. It was not always safe dancing with them, especially 'cause they were often focused on the steps and not on the follower's safety. So it was hard to relax and stay focused - I was trying to watch out for myself too.

However, when I began dancing with one of the more advanced men, who DOES dance from the inside out...even in the midst of this melee, I could hardly keep my eyes open! What I mean is...that his depth naturally awakened me to my depth and it was hard to focus on the outer environment much at all---meaning anything beyond my body and his. [So here I am dancing in this tango-zoo with my eyes closed!! Transported to an inner world where the music and close movement seemed to meld our bodies into one.]

And it really was like being part of his body...or being part of the One body that our two bodies become for those three minutes.

This, for me, is tango at its best.

And it's amazingly sensual without being sexual. In fact, in a funny sense, it's almost as if bringing in overt sexual energy would be an intrusion, a dilution, or diminishment, of what is so lushly available. [And it could be wonderful...just different.]

Also, I've enjoyed dances of this nature, or at least in this direction, with a few men who I've never danced with before. And there are even a few more "beginner types" locally who naturally bring this sense of moving "from the inside out" to their learning and leading. I enjoy dancing with them too.

BTW, in the back of my mind, I keep thinking I should qualify what I'm saying that those who are more technically oriented, or less feeling or intuitively oriented...will realize that this is One woman's view. It is Not about they lead or what they value.

It is about what I/I/I value. And certainly not every woman values this I know. It may not even make sense to some or many of them.

However, for me, it is food for my soul. And it's why I do the Argentine Tango.

Hasta comunion...

Pat McCallum
Washington, D.C.

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